7 Things Narcissists Say to Get You Back

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What do narcissists say to get you back? This is a post of the phrases I’ve curated over time in trying to escape from a narcissist’s clutches. I tried so hard to get out over and over again but these few things kept me coming back. I truly hope you won’t be a victim to these wildly manipulative phrases narcissist’s say to get you back.

Don’t forget to grab my new e-book on Narcissism here.

How narcissists suck you back into a toxic relationship

When you decide to go no-contact with a narcissist, they will get enraged. That’s only because of the narcissist’s monstrous ego.

Narcissists will want to get you back by any means possible. They are going to spin intricate lies to reel you back in like a fish to bait.

If you are in such a situation, or you just want to make sure you don’t get into such a situation, you are going to want to know these 7 manipulative things narcissists say to get you back.

Narcissists kind of know that you already have an unhealthy addiction to them. They know that they can get you back. In fact, they think they can get you back because of their inflated sense of importance.

SOME OF THESE MANIPULATIVE THINGS NARCISSISTS SAY TO GET YOU BACK MIGHT SEEM A BIT COMICAL. YOU FEEL LIKE YOU COULD NEVER BELIEVE SUCH THINGS. BUT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CONTINUES TO HAPPEN, BECAUSE NARCISSISTS ARE GOOD AT THEIR GAME.

By the way, when you read some of these manipulative phrases used by narcissists, you might feel like you could never fall for such nonsense. The thing is, people who fall for narcissists have been manipulated to the tee. They are in some kind of enchantment, a well-spun spell by the master magician: the narcissist.

What Narcissists Say to get You Back

Buckle up, because you’re in for a ride. If you find yourself broken up with a narcissist, you have to be aware of these manipulative things narcissists will say to get you back. Be strong and don’t fall for them.

1 | I’m going for therapy

Honestly, this one can come when you accuse someone of being a narcissist.

They get threatened at first, rage about it, and then finally figure out a way to play this to their advantage.

Let’s face it—no one wants to be called a narcissist to their face, even if they are one.

A narcissist will go to therapy and pretend that they are now cured, and they now have a normal personality.

Narcissists can also suggest marriage counseling to drag you back into giving them another try. Of course, this will probably end poorly, and they will find a way to trap you so that way you won’t be able to leave or go no-contact again.

A narcissist will make sure to collect the data on what it would take to make you never complain about them again, and use this to manipulate you further.

2 | Can we just be friends?

Imagine you approach a narcissist with the intention of breaking off a relationship. They will catch on super-fast and turn the tables on you.

A favorite ruse used by narcissists to get you back is to agree with you and say that, yeah, I was thinking the same thing, we really need to break up. That it was their idea as well. This makes you doubt yourself. Do they really like me? It is used to make you doubt yourself.

Of course, they don’t mean it. They will keep coming back and manipulating you into giving them free benefits.

WHEN IT COMES TO NARCISSISTS, DISAPPEARING FROM THEIR LIVES IS THE BEST WAY TO GO. ASKING TO BE FRIENDS IS JUST A WAY TO MANIPULATE YOU TO GET YOU BACK.

When narcissists latch on, it’s going to be really hard to get rid of them. Phrases like, “Can we just be friends?” is a way to keep you in their lives forever.

The best way to get rid of a narcissist is to go cold-turkey and drop out of their lives. They will keep coming back for what you gave them. They think that if you gave it once, you will do it again… and again.

“Can we be friends?” is a staple for narcissists. No, we cannot. There is no “friends” with a narcissist.

If they have ANY access to you, they will keep showing up, and repeating their old stories filled with manipulation. They will bring up sob stories about how they miss you so much, and need you back.

3 | I knew you weren’t right for me

Narcissists feed off of your low self-esteem.

It’s incredulous how narcissists have so much confidence to say the most self-entitled things.

Saying “I knew you weren’t right for me,” is a move to keep wondering about your worth. It makes you try to keep up your efforts in order to prove your worth to the narcissist.

They will say things that put you down, and make you feel like absolute crap. That’s a tactic used to test your self-esteem. When you keep failing (or rather passing) their tests, they will put you in the “perfect target” category.

BEING MANIPULATED BY NARCISSISTS TO GET YOU BACK CAN BACKFIRE ON YOU, BECAUSE NARCISSISTS ALWAYS KNOW HOW TO WIN. A BREAK UP TURNS INTO A CONTEST FOR YOU TO SHOW THE NARCISSIST THAT YOU WERE GOOD ENOUGH AND DID SO MUCH FOR THEM.

Narcissists get high off people making them feel like royalty.

Narcissists love that feeling when you try to prove to them that you are worthy of them. When you treat them like a boss who you want to impress.

When you prove to be that kind of person, they will latch on to you and never let go. People like that are a bit of a specialty dish for narcissists. Narcissists love their weakness.

This is why it is important to have boundaries. Having boundaries helps you to spot red flags. People with boundaries can’t stand mistreatment by narcissists.

4 | I’ll make it up to you

The narcissist will call you and say he is willing to do whatever it takes to make you choose them again. They will promise to change and be good to you.

Remember, people can never really change from how they are. More so a narcissist.

A lot of people who are in love with narcissists will fall for this trick because let’s just say, love is a blind and powerful force in this world. It blinds you to the fact that this man is manipulating you. He is lying and deceiving you. Forgiving him is a bad idea.

In fact, a narcissist will show up with gifts and flowers to try to win you back. They will start to text you the I-love-you’s and the good-morning-beautiful messages that you always wanted. They will compliment you to the stars.

You have to be cautious of these deceptions. In fact, if a narcissist knew that’s what you wanted all along, why didn’t they do it? That’s easy. It’s because they were waiting to use it in an emergency like this.

5 | You’re the only one for me

Narcissists have a high chance of infidelity.

They cheat because they want a lot of people to make them feel like they are royalty. More people = More devotion to them.

However, be careful, because narcissists will twist words together to justify their cheating to you. They will talk about how they only really love you.

These are some wild theories about why they are cheating on you:

I can’t help cheating.
It’s a defense mechanism from a bad childhood.
So many people want me and I can’t help it. (In what world is that okay?)
They will claim sexual assault.

A narcissist being involved with many people is actually going to do a number on your self esteem. You will begin to feel like it’s your privilege to be associated with them. You will doubt your worth and your uniqueness. You will start feeling like you are the one benefiting from being with this amazing person. That is just so messed up.

6 | We were broken up

Being in a relationship with a narcissist means being ready to be cheated on.

We were broken up.

This is only one of many lies a narcissist will say to cover up their infidelity. Let’s face it—cheating is cheating.

Narcissists have the audacity to lie and spin tales about their cheating. No one wants to deal with a cheating spouse or significant other. A narcissist will deny having done anything, but sometimes they will say incredulous things to get you off their back.

Narcissists will say that the both of you were broken up at the time of their cheating. They will say that they used protection because they respect you enough not to give you an STD. The audacity of these people!

A narcissist will spin their cheating as a reason for how you never really loved them like they desire. They will turn this into your failure.

A NARCISSIST’S BIGGEST CON IS TO CRUMBLE DOWN YOUR SELF ESTEEM BIT, BY EVERLOVING BIT. THEY WANT YOU TO FEEL A POWER DIFFERENCE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

Narcissists will play with your self-esteem in order to make you feel like you aren’t worthy of them. They will make themselves appear to be a person who is wanted by so many people, and yet you aren’t. Remember that narcissists are capable of manipulating innocent people into a web of lies and deception.

7 | Any religious gabble to get you back

Narcissistic men will almost always be women-haters.

They will tell you about how it is the woman’s duty to obey the man. They will tell you that you won’t make it to heaven for being so mean to them. This could also be counter-intuitive because they are probably the least religious person you know.

They do things that belie their words. However, they are cunning enough to structure their deceptions well enough that you would believe it.

Religion is a favorite ruse used by narcissists all over the world. There is something about belief and faith that just gets people hysterical. People don’t want to go to hell. So, a woman will listen to the narcissistic man and do his bidding because he brings religion into the mix.

The Takeaway

I hope this post on what narcissists say to get you back has been helpful to you. Scroll down below and comment your thoughts on narcissism in the comments section.

Narcissists are extremely manipulative people.

Anything they say or do is probably a way to put you down and make you feel inferior. They get immense pleasure off of this.

The only way to break it off with a narcissist forever is to go no-contact. Drop off their radar completely. No goodbye is necessary.

During no-contact is when narcissists will bombard you with extreme lies and deceptions in order to get you back. After all, why would they want to lose a source of their narcissistic supply? This is someone who was the perfect victim and delivered their every whim with no qualms.

There is no happiness and joy with getting back with a narcissist. In fact, things will only get worse. The best way to beat a narcissist is to stay strong in your no-contact phase of cutting them off.

Check out my new e-book on narcissism: Click Here

Narcissism E-Book, Guide to Dealing with A Narcissist In Your Life

I successfully defeated a narcissist in my life, and I continue to defeat one in my life every day. This e-book is a collection of posts and journal entries that I look back on to remind me that no matter what, I am worthy. I am deserving. If you need a guide to show you how to deal with that narcissist in your life, and are called to buy this book, click here.

YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE CRAP – A revolutionary mini-course on how to pick up the pieces of your life and detach from malicious narcissists.

Additional Helpful Posts:

Helpful Books on Narcissism:

What narcissists say to get you back into the relationship

What Narcissists Say to Get You Back into a Toxic Relationship

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7 Things Narcissists Say to Get You Back

SOME OF THESE MANIPULATIVE THINGS NARCISSISTS SAY TO GET YOU BACK MIGHT SEEM A BIT COMICAL. YOU FEEL LIKE YOU COULD NEVER BELIEVE SUCH THINGS. BUT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CONTINUES TO HAPPEN, BECAUSE NARCISSISTS ARE GOOD AT THEIR GAME.