While I was taking a shower earlier today, I realized that I’m officially one year self harm clean! In order to celebrate this, I decided to write a post about my top 10 self harm alternatives! Wow. I feel great. It feels amazing knowing that I chose to get better. I chose the path of healing and self love.

As humans, we go through things that hurt us. This is especially so as we are teens to young adults. Our emotions and feelings are very intense in this stage of our lives. This is how it’s meant to be in the journey called life. It’s meant to define your character.

This is why it’s important to establish healthy coping skills at a young age. Healthy coping skills refer to activities that channel your emotions in a way that is productive and will not bring you any detrimental effects. In this post I’ll be sharing some healthy coping mechanisms.

On the other hand, unhealthy coping mechanisms have the potential to get you into some serious trouble. Things like binge-eating, starving, cutting, turning to alcohol, drugs and toxic relationships are unhealthy for you. They can complicate your health and bring negative effects that can hurt you even when you’re older.

Stopping a bad habit takes a while. If you’re addicted to self harm, it will take a while for you to stop it completely. Be patient with yourself when you slip up. If you remain consistent to your cause, in time you will finally be free.

Top 10 Self Harm Alternatives

Here are my top 10 self harm alternatives:

1 | Paint on your skin

Paint on your skin using non-toxic paint. You can paint abstract with colors, or paint easy things like flowers. This will distract you from needing to harm your body, and you’ll instead be making a mess that needs to be cleaned up. Same thing, but not harmful!

2 | Scream into your pillow

Screaming into your pillow is a healthy way to get your emotions out. If you’ve hung around here long enough, you know that I’ve had anger issues. These days, I know how to manage my anger. one of the ways I do this is by screaming into my pillow. I’ll scream out about how people are doing me wrong or how things are unfair. It’s better than bruising your knuckles and being in pain.

3 | Punch your pillow

If you’re violent, don’t punch a wall. That stuff sucks. Punch a pillow, or if you have a punching bag, go ham on it. Emotions always get translated into something physical. Sometimes you feel like crying, and other times you want to hit something. as a self harm alternative, punch a pillow, or a stuffed toy.

4 | Exercise

One of my top 10 self harm alternatives is to exercise. I don’t time my exercises, I just exhaust myself. I just pull out my workout mat and start jogging in place. I throw in a bunch of squats and lunges and repeat the process until all the emotions have been dealt with.

5 | Blast loud music

This is one of the easiest among self harm alternatives. Music takes my mind off things. I can easily slip into a mind-numbing zombie mood when I’m listening to music. It’s even better if it’s really loud. Music can drown out thoughts of anxiety and depression. In fact, studies show that listening to music can uplift your mood.

6 | Talk to a friend

For some people, talking about feelings is hard. If you call a friend, you don’t have to talk about what you’re going through. Just talk about regular things. This is a great self harm alternative. Another great way is to type out a text to your friends, but delete it before you send it. That can help you to put your thoughts eloquently for others to understand but yet you don’t send it in the end.

7 | Write down your feelings and burn them

Burning things can give you this level of satisfaction. It signifies that you are letting go of those hurtful feelings. Write down on paper how you feel without paying attention to any grammar, spelling or punctuation. Then burn the paper (while taking the necessary precaution), watch it burn and clear up the ashes. This is a great self harm alternative, too. You will feel much better. Of course, you could also just journal your feelings, which has pretty much the same effect.

8 | Soak in a bath

There’s something about showers in particular that worsen my tears. Maybe it’s the likeness that the water drops have with tears, LOL! Forget a shower and soak yourself in a bath, maybe throw in a bath bomb, a few drops of essential oils, or rose petals. If you don’t have a bath tub, just take a quick shower and do some skin care activities like face masks, moisturize your whole body, or wear a nice perfume. Force yourself to be nice.

9 | Call a hotline

Feeling like self harming is probably an indication of suicidal ideation. If you feel like you’re going to hurt yourself, please reach out to a hotline. Click this link and save it in case you ever need it. I know how it feels when everything is hopeless. I’m not saying it will go away completely, I’m telling you that you can cope and learn to function like a well adjusted person.

10 | Find alternatives for violent emotions

If these self harm alternatives don’t work for you, you need to try out many things in order to find the right coping mechanism. It’s a trial and error. If you really want to protect yourself and grow out of your darkness, you need to do your best. And even if you can’t do your best, you need to do your least. What’s the least you can possibly do to help yourself? It doesn’t matter if you fail after trying. Focus on creating neural pathways that tell your brain that you are trying.